All sex activities in Second Life require some type of tool to happen. It may be a HUD, a pose ball, OR a piece of furniture. There needs to be an object containing the needed animations for the avatars to be synced together. Also, obviously, you’ll need… Ehrm, genitals, the avatars do not come with those parts by default. Some females don’t see the point in having a set of external genitals, but men certainly do understand why they’re somewhat of a necessity.
You’ll need to “sit” on the same object (furniture) or poseballs from the same HUD with your partner(s) to interact sexually (or romantically).
Before your avatar is animated by the object, the script may ask whether it is OK to animate your avatar or not. It’s like safe sex on top of safe sex here. ;p
Sitting on furniture is pretty self-explanatory, but sometimes sex functions come from a screen-worn HUD your partner may be wearing, or an object they are wearing on their avatar, without you being able to see the object or HUD itself. In that case, if you see a blue or pink ball appear, that would be a poseball that you sit on. The blue pose balls contain male animations, and the pink is for the girls not surprisingly. If there is only one poseball appearing, it means the object already controls the other person as they are wearing it. If the balls are the same color, there is a script in there that will detect your gender automatically.
Your avi’s gender
Sometimes you might accidentally, or by default, sit in the wrong gender position. If this happens, and it sometimes does, find the menu item “swap,” and it will swap both of you in opposite positions. You may also have to pick a spot from several “sitters” if you’re super kinky. ;p
(Your avi’s gender is based on the shape you wear. It is simply a setting in shape file you wear. If you’re systematically sat in the wrong position, you might be wearing the wrong gender shape, also possibly making your mesh avatar difficult to shape).
You can, thus, switch genders on a fly whenever you want. It makes gender-based security systems somewhat of an honor system, but they send a message at least.
There is also a way to create “median” gendered avatars, but that’s a topic I know very little about myself.
ALIGNING (Menu: Adjust)
Because everything in Second Life is created by its own users, not everything matches together too well. It’s both the beauty and the curse of SL. Animations are no exception.
Many creators, many ways of doing things, many levels of experience, and therefore, one piece of furniture can contain animations from dozens of different creators over 19 (as of writing this) year time span. This means that each animation is subject to some drama.
Very few of the SL creators possess the skills of professionals. Many freebie animations that are everywhere were created as the first attempt at animation and were later given out as freebies as the creator figured the animation quality wouldn’t justify the price tag. Therefore, they may have selected the wrong priority for the animation, or it was originally created for a different purpose. Thus, your animation override may override one of the sex furniture animations, while another animation in the same item may work fine.
Therefore, it’s a good practice to disable your animation override HUD (if and once you get one) when sitting on any furniture, particularly during sex animations. Suppose your avatar is stuck in a sitting position. There are two possible reasons: your Animation Override (AO) hud overrides the sex, or you haven’t given the furniture permission to animate your avatar (a menu opens on the top right corner to ask you this).
The GOOD SEX
Although this takes a lot of effort at times, it pays to try and align the animations to match what it is that you’re supposedly doing. (Not all people bother doing this, which is quite annoying.) MOST furniture now works with something called an AV Sitter, which means each sitter can be independently repositioned in the scene, bringing the avatar sitting on it with it.
You can practice aligning things with normal furniture, and there are ALWAYS problems with them. ALWAYS. That’s just a headache you have to live with or do something about it if you know how, but for all this time, it has and continues to be a problem.
TOO BIG AVATAR AND TOO BIG COCK
This, too, has to do with the sex animations…
MANY men on Second Life want to be as big as possible. However, anything over 2 meters is intended for giants and fantasy characters. This often makes the girl seem super small, as girls tend to stick to their height a little longer than men do and adjust it simply because men are too bullheaded to come down a bit. 😀
(You can adjust your height by right-clicking your avatar, choosing ‘appearance’ -> ‘Edit shape.’ The first tab is ‘the body,’ and the first slider is height. Many male shapes are already created BIG, so the chances are that to keep yourself below 2 meters, you’ll have to drag the slider all the way down the scale. The average male height in meters is about 1.70 meters, but for SL purposes, 1.90 meters is probably better unless you want to keep your height literal to real life. There’ll be a ton of women dwarfing you at this height, but just so you know… you are allowed to disagree with a woman and decide for yourself what height is YOUR height.)
You can adjust your cock’s size to whatever monstrous size you want, but on Second Life, it’s kind of wasted… EVERYONE can do it. Also, when the animation no longer looks even remotely real, and the cock’s size is about the size of a girl’s head… It stops being erotic and starts being ridiculous.
Still, even if you like to readjust your animations, your casual partner may not be or not be very good at it. Therefore, sometimes the best idea is just to suck it up and change the point of view on the viewer… Or, of course, say; “thanks for this, but I’m outta here.”
 VOICE
You can also play with voice on Second Life which can be either truly awkward or a massive turn-on, depending on your personality and who you’re with. Some people love it; some people hate it, and some feel somewhere in between.
All it takes is a normal headset or ear plug things that you’d normally use. I’d tell you where the setting is accessed, but depending on your viewer (most people recommend switching to Firestorm Viewer), the button can be found in different locations. On FireStorm, it’s probably on the lower bar of your screen; it looks like a microphone with an empty tick box next to it. If it’s not, right-click on the toolbar, pick ‘toolbar buttons,” and drag it onto the toolbar to use it.
Enable voice by plugging in your actual physical microphone and headset and clicking the check box and microphone icon on. The tick keeps the button either pressed in or not. You may want to manually hold it down every time you speak so you don’t forget it on, in which case, you don’t use the tick.
Being so technical, you deserve applause if your SL sex game is on par. 😉