This is general SLetiquette, not particularly for ZEN METAL, although most of it applies. Anything that would normally apply in real life still applies on Second Life, but the following things that you might not notice will create an issue for someone else on Second Life if not paid attention to.
As a newbie, be patient.
When you first join Second Life, be patient and forgive sim-owners who eject you directly for being a newbie. Many sim owners don’t want to deal with new people who are sometimes rude, looking for “quick fixes,” if you know what I mean, or are deliberately trolling that particular sim by creating a new avatar to bypass their security.
They may also wish for their visitors to be fully mesh – beautiful to look at and dressed to a code, which you, as a new resident, are unlikely to be. Your focus on your avatar shows ‘commitment’ to the game, and that will win points with the Second Life obsessed. 🙂
You might also exercise some patience on how long everything takes to load, how weirdly sized a lot of things are, and how everyone on a popular sim is of a different scale. 😀 Everyone plays a different scale here. (Drives me mental, personally, but… Patience, patience…)
You are welcome on ZEN METAL Hub as a newbie. (You may already be there reading this, who knows.)
Read the profile before IMing ANYONE.
Before talking to a new person, in a private message, ALWAYS check out their profile first. I CANNOT BELIEVE how many men skip this step to be POLITE! The profile is there TO BE READ. (Ladies, men think they’d be snooping, that’s why they don’t read it. The poor things think it’s some kind of a diary. :D)
The profile is basically an opportunity to say: GLBTQ+ or straight. Single or spoken for. CIS or trans. Interested in dating/new friends or not, lol.
It is especially important to check out a person’s profile on Adult and dating sims, or you’ll make BLUNDERS.
NOT ONE profile I’ve ever read seems to be written for friends only. Women seem typically FED UP with the fact men ignore their profiles, or seem to simply skim it superficially. You’ll be INSTANTLY gaining points if you refer to any talking points in his or her profile. (Test this theory by going to a busy sim and reading some profiles just for research purposes. Just try it, man.)
The reason why people are sometimes very rude in their profiles.
Please don’t read too much into the rudeness you see in people’s profiles. It is HARD to avoid super rude people on Second Life, and the profiles often turn into lectures on basic etiquette for a good, understandable reason. (Test this theory by switching into a female avatar and see what happens. ;p You don’t have to reply to any IM’s you’ll receive.)
Good-looking male avatars and newbie-looking females are often the most hit on characters on the grid, and you can TELL by how “spikey” they behave when approached. (Why newbie females? They seem ‘mouldable’ and very single.)
TIP: If you ever have a fallout with someone… The chances are they’ll edit their profile to reflect that particular fuck up. ;p Curious?
When filling out YOUR profile.
It is POLITE to also add something in your own profile. In real-life section, at least inform people on whether you mix RL with SL. There are people who don’t see the point in full fantasy living, and then there are those who can’t see why anyone would want to mix RL into any of it. You don’t have to say anything more than that if you’re a very private person.
If you are in an opposite gender avatar, the polite thing to do is to inform about it in your 1st Life tab. “Non-binary, M, or F” is enough. (Or at least say, “I’m nothing like my character in real life,” if you really don’t want to reveal anything.) And I’m sorry, but it does matter, and it does matter to enough people to be worth sharing. You don’t have to win over the world, right? Can’t date all of them, can you, no matter how big of a slut you are. 😉
- Avoid airing out your frustrations in your profile… Although I have committed that sin more than once myself. ;p
- Write about what you love instead of what you hate.
- Write to people you’re interested in instead of to people you don’t want.
- Be yourself, but be careful to notice when something is a preference, not a general rule. Avoid putting (new) people under the impression some practice is generic rather than your personal preference.
- Use Picks to extend your profile.
I’m working on a profile writing pod tour; complain to me if it’s not there yet!!
Have a quick scan of each individual sim’s rules.
When you visit a new sim, you usually get a rule card or two and a few huds slung in your face. If you plan on even talking to anyone there, read it before you do anything else. You can have a general look around, but especially if it’s an adult sim, you should definitely read the rules as soon as possible, as they can get pretty kinky! (The rules on a kinky sim can also be a bit of a turn-on, so… That’s what you’re there for.) Do not assume Adult sims do not have etiquette. They usually have a very strict one.
On G- and M-rated sims, the rules are mostly to warn rude people about what will get them ejected and banned. They’re mostly pretty self-explanatory; don’t be a dick.
Tip sim owners, DJ’s, and hosts!
Remember that sim owners don’t work for Linden Labs. They often run their sims at a loss because they love doing nice things for people.
If you like the place and find a use for it—like enjoying it—please drop some Lindens in tip jars you might see around. (50 Lindens is a reasonable tip, especially if you tip every DJ and host, who, by the way, often work for tips, but the more, the better.)
You don’t need to tip sims you don’t care for and plan never to visit again, shops, or sims that don’t seem to be collecting tips… Unless you’re just really nice… And like… Loaded.
Notice that there are private sims and public sims
There are residential areas on Second Life that are not intended for public access even if there is no security installed. Some people might not think anyone would access their parcel not knowing it’s there, but you might randomly happen to a private residence, especially following a random teleport or an old landmark.
Adult avatars vs. child avatars
A real-life teen girl is about 1.5 meters tall. A grown-up female is 1.60 meters tall or taller (up to maybe 1.75, after which they’re strikingly tall). The 1.5 meters is often used as a limit for child avatars to enter parcels. Therefore, if you’re a short adult, maybe set your height to at least 1.51 meters, which is quite low enough for even a person with dwarfism, considering most people create way oversized avatars on Second Life. In general, I urge people to use 1.8 as the absolute separation point between male and female avatar heights. (Average female is 1.65 meters tall, but not on Second Life. 1.83 meters equals 6 foot height, and anything above that should probably be reserved for male avis only – unless you’re a really tall girl in real and want that to reflect.)
Avatar height requirements may vary from sim-to-sim. There are places that request or encourage you to use realistic human avatars that adhere to your own or an average person’s heights and limitations.
Real life vs. Second Life
There are people who mix real life with Second Life, and there are those who keep them absolutely separate. If a person offers nothing from their real life in their profile, it may not be polite to ask.
People who DO mix real life with Second Life work the other way around. It may not be polite to keep all of your real life hidden from someone who is open about theirs, and it is not polite to be in a 100% role play with a person who is not role playing. They’re sharing who they are, you’re sharing who you might never even want to be. That makes a big difference in how you’re “playing the game.”
Friending people
Some quite friendly people send friend requests to complete strangers without talking to them first. Please don’t. You can’t be that friendly if you wish to remain polite.
You CAN talk to people you don’t know without adding them as friends. That said, some people have disabled the ability for others to IM them without being a friend, but if they have, they DEFINITELY don’t want a friend request out of the blue. (Try talking to them in Local Chat if they’re on a ‘social’ sim.)
